Damned by Cynthia Rayne
(Four Horsemen MC #3)
Publication date: February 17th 2015
Genres: Adult, Contemporary, Romance
Rose Weston is in hell.
After being kidnapped and held as a sex slave, she is struggling to come to terms with the trauma. Under the care of her sister, Daisy, Rose is recovering at the Hades Motel& Diner, owned by the Four Horsemen MC. When Rose is threatened by her former captor, she asks Duke for help.
Duke has been to hell and back.
After surviving an abusive childhood, dangerous black ops missions, and a couple stints in prison, Duke is reluctant to give a damn about anyone but himself. Despite his better judgment, he finds himself helping Rose. She touches a place in his cold heart, no other woman has. He reluctantly agrees to teach her self-defense skills. Together, they will make the man who held her captive pay. But he doesn’t count on what a temptation Rose can be. She wants to share his bed, have a sexual relationship on her own terms, but is she ready after the abuse she’s suffered? Or is she damned?
After being kidnapped and held as a sex slave, she is struggling to come to terms with the trauma. Under the care of her sister, Daisy, Rose is recovering at the Hades Motel& Diner, owned by the Four Horsemen MC. When Rose is threatened by her former captor, she asks Duke for help.
Duke has been to hell and back.
After surviving an abusive childhood, dangerous black ops missions, and a couple stints in prison, Duke is reluctant to give a damn about anyone but himself. Despite his better judgment, he finds himself helping Rose. She touches a place in his cold heart, no other woman has. He reluctantly agrees to teach her self-defense skills. Together, they will make the man who held her captive pay. But he doesn’t count on what a temptation Rose can be. She wants to share his bed, have a sexual relationship on her own terms, but is she ready after the abuse she’s suffered? Or is she damned?
Chapter One
She’s a hot mess.
Duke watched Rose Weston as
she sat, eating dinner with her older sister, Daisy, and his club
brother, Cowboy. The girl tried hard to hide it, but he could see the
chaos bubbling beneath the surface, even two tables over.
Not that it was any of his
fucking business.
Hades, the Four Horsemen’s
motel and diner, had quite a crowd tonight. The diner had a fifties
feel to it with a black and white checkered floor, red vinyl booths,
silver stools, and Texas memorabilia on the walls like an old Route
66 sign and a Texaco star.
Tonight, the place was packed
for another one of their brotherhood dinners. Voodoo, a brother who
served as the Hades chef and proprietor, barked orders at the
prospects.
Prospects, or potential
members of the motorcycle club, had to be at the beck and call of all
the full-fledged members in order to prove their worth. It was a lot
like pledging a fraternity. At the moment, they hustled to take drink
orders and deliver food to the brothers’ tables.
Duke did a perimeter sweep of
the room, a habit left over from his Special Forces routine. He noted
the weapons his brothers carried as well as the exits and entrances,
which they always kept clear in case some escape and evasion became
necessary, or E&E in military lingo.
He couldn’t help but stare
at the train wreck of a girl again.
She did her level best to look
normal. Rose laughed and smiled often. She even managed to eat most
of the food on her plate. But her eyes! They told an altogether
different story. Bleak, shuttered, and chilly, they reminded him of
an abandoned home. And she couldn’t quite disguise the pain in
their depths.
No one else seemed to notice,
not even her sister. Maybe they were relieved she got home safe and
didn’t really look too close. Two months ago, Duke had pulled her
out of a cage. A
fucking cage. Some
bat shit crazy lawyer for the Raptors, a rival MC, kept her as a sex
slave. Fuck only knows what the pervert did to her.
Cowboy saddled him with
protecting Rose, but Duke didn’t consider babysitting or counseling
to be part of the job description. So, he kept his distance and
watched her like a fucking hawk, in case her former rapist came
looking for her. Rose had decided not to move in with Cowboy and
Daisy when his brother reclaimed his old house and who could blame
her? Pretending to be fine all the fucking time could be exhausting.
Duke had given up on being
normal years ago. But
still.
He couldn’t help but notice
her. Her pain called to him on so many levels and she fascinated the
hell out of him, though he couldn’t quite put his finger on exactly
why.
While he could appreciate her
beauty, he usually went for older women, with loads of sexual
experience and very little inhibitions. Rose had long blond hair
which fell to the middle of her back and curled around her pretty
face. She had wide-spaced warm brown eyes, framed by pale lashes and
even paler skin.
She’d been thin as a
lamppost when he took her out of the cage, but she’d started to
fill out again, her hips and breasts rounding out thanks to Voodoo’s
cooking. Not that you could see her new curves. Tonight, she wore an
oversized pair of jeans and a long-sleeved Dallas Cowboys shirt she
kept tugging at, trying to force the sleeves below her fingertips.
That
caught his attention. Something about the gesture bothered him.
Abruptly, her companions
finished their food and Rose hugged her sister and Cowboy goodbye.
After they left, she sat alone at the table. For a moment, she stared
at the tabletop, absently moving the salt and pepper packets around
in their tiny blue dish. Then she shook her head, as though trying to
focus. Finally, she lurched to her feet, grabbed her bag, and headed
out the rear of the diner.
Duke forced his attention back
to the hand-cut fries on his plate, slathering one with ketchup
before bringing it to his mouth. He shot a glance at Shepherd,
another of his MC brothers, who currently devoured a bacon
cheeseburger. They sat at a table together against the wall.
Voodoo stuffed the burgers
with bacon, onion, and cheese and they were tasty, though not his
usual fare. Voo nearly always insisted on cooking, mostly because he
couldn’t stand to eat inferior food. None of them argued about it.
After all, how could they compete with an honest to God chef?
“What the fuck are you
starin’ so hard at?” Shep asked.
“None of your business.”
Duke was in a decidedly
shitty mood, as per usual.
The blond biker grinned.
“Haven’t you figured it out by now? Everything
is my business, brother.” He tapped his VP patch, like it was the
biker equivalent of the ‘S’ on Superman’s chest.
Shepherd could be a real nosy
bastard. While he was only in his late twenties, he had the instincts
of a blue-haired biddy when it came to digging up dirt. He had
absolutely no qualms about crawling through your private life, so
Duke rarely offered up much in the way of personal info.
He liked his private life to
stay exactly that, private.
“The hellion I’m currently
fucking,” he lied. He nodded to the busty bottle blonde he had on
tap. Fuck if he could remember her name though. The hellion preened
when his eyes rested on her, thrusting out her chest and fluffing her
hair. He’d mentally dubbed her Chesty, due to her ample assets. Of
course, she’d told him her name their first night together, but
he’d been shit-faced and horny as hell after years in prison with
only his own slicked up hand for relief.
The night of his welcome home
from prison bash, she’d touched his thigh under the table when she
whispered her name. He’d nearly cum from that alone. He thought it
started with an ‘L’. Linda? Leslie? Who the fuck knows? It was
too late to ask now without looking like a dick. Besides, talking
wasn’t really their thing. Whatever her name was, she had a kinky
streak, he enjoyed exploring, and she didn’t demand much of his
time outside of bed. It was casual and fun, so it suited his needs
fine.
The VP followed the direction
of his gaze and rolled his eyes. “Jesus Christ.”
“You got a problem with me
getting my dick wet?”
The other man angled his head
to the side. “Pussy is a fine distraction, brother, but it ain’t
a cure. In fact, it’s been known to cause more problems than it
solves.”
“Like you would know? You
probably got moth balls in your boxers. When’s the last time you
got laid?” None of the brothers had ever seen him with a hellion.
Ever.
Shep tucked a bit of a
fuck you into his
good ol’ boy grin. “No room for anything in there, but my own
big, hairy set of balls, brother.”
Rolling his eyes, Duke leaned
back in his chair, crossed his arms over his chest. “A cure for
what, Shepherd? Last time I checked, I ain’t got an affliction.”
The VP snorted. “We both
know you’re talkin’ out your ass now.”
“Don’t even try to fix
him, Shep. He was a psycho long before he went to prison,” Ryker
put in.
Duke glanced at Ryker and his
old lady, Elizabeth, who sat at the table next to theirs. The guy
never missed an opportunity to run his big fat mouth. Ryker bugged
the shit out of him. He reminded Duke of one of those kid’s toys, a
Ken doll – all looks and no substance. And his initial critical
opinion dove to new lows every second he spent with the asshole.
“Why don’t you go back to
your date and shut the fuck up?” Judging by his full plate and the
empty shot glasses, Ryker had drunk enough Jack tonight to stun a
heavy metal guitarist. On an empty stomach, no less.
“Ryker, let’s just have a
nice evening,” Elizabeth said, placing a hand on his arm.
“We will,” he answered,
“as soon as I take care of some business.” He leaned forward in
his chair, a smirk on his face. “Speaking of girlfriends, you look
awful cozy over there with Shep.”
The VP muttered a curse.
Duke raised a brow. ‘What
the fuck are you babbling about?”
“Oh, come on! You’re the
one who’s supposed to be a brainiac. It’s a joke.” He widened
his eyes. “Get it? You’re all intense, practically eye-fucking
him.”
A cold-eyed stare was Duke’s
only reply.
“Jesus, learn how to take a
joke, brother. Like I give a shit who you fuck.”
“Lay off the booze, Ryker,
and eat your damn food,” Shep said tiredly, not so much as sparing
either of them a glance.
“Come on, he’s right. You
should eat something,” Elizabeth coaxed. “Voodoo outdid himself
tonight. These burgers are amazing.”
Ignoring her, Ryker stood up
and advanced on Duke.
“Get the fuck away from me,
man,” Duke muttered, gripping the edge of the table.
Ken Doll laughed. “And here
I thought you got used to men being close. You know, bending over for
the soap in the big house. Five years is a long time to go without
pussy brother.”
“If you know what’s good
for you, you’ll sit down. Now,”
Duke warned, in a chilly, quiet voice.
“Why don’t you make me!?”
That’s it.
Duke shot up out of his chair
and socked Ryker in the jaw, causing the other man’s head to rock
back. Shepherd tried to push himself between them, but Duke nailed
Ryker with a blow to the gut. Then, Ryker clipped Shepherd’s jaw
before he backhanded Duke, sending him reeling into another table.
“Break it up!” Shepherd
ordered. He roared at the prospects, “get your asses over here and
run interference!”
They dashed over, but Duke
ignored the commotion and circled Ryker, keeping his fists up. Ryker
had been itching for an excuse to start some shit with him ever since
he got paroled.
“Both of you knock it off!”
Captain bellowed, jumping out of his seat and striding over.
Undaunted, Duke grabbed the
back of Ryker’s head and slammed the bridge of his nose into a
nearby table, causing blood to spatter and drip down to the floor.
“Oh fuck!” Shep growled.
Out of the corner of his eye,
Duke saw Elizabeth withdraw the Taser Daisy had encouraged her to buy
and launch herself at him with a war cry. Fetch blocked her attack,
but quickly fell shuddering to the floor in a haze of electrified
pain.
Ryker tackled Duke to the
ground and together they rolled over and over, eventually crashing
into tables and chairs. A couple of prospects physically pried Ryker
off, and held him at bay. Pretty Boy held onto Elizabeth to keep her
from pouncing again. The Taser lay harmlessly on the ground at her
feet.
Captain arrived on the scene
and when Duke got up to have another go at Ryker, the Prez stepped in
between them. “What the hell is wrong with both of you?”
Duke jerked a thumb at Ryker.
“He called me a fucking fag.”
“No, I said you might like a
dick in your ass,” Ryker retorted. “Didn’t say you were gay.”
“Both of you shut the hell
up!” Captain shouted. “You’re giving me a fucking headache. If
you want to beat the shit out of each other, be my guest, but don’t
break club property and don’t do it in front of the old ladies,”
he said, gesturing to the women in the room. “Now get the fuck out
of my sight and cool off.”
“This doesn’t concern you,
old man,” Ryker drawled.
“What did you say to me,
boy?” Captain roared, closing the distance between himself and
Ryker. They stood inches apart and neither one of them spoke.
Everyone got real quiet. No
glassware clinking, or chairs squeaking, not even the scrape of
cutlery on plates. No
one mouthed off to
Captain. Well, no one but Eddie.
“Nothing,” Ryker said,
looking away.
“That’s what I thought,”
Captain barked. “I don’t want to see either of you the rest of
the night or tomorrow either. If I do, I might shoot you both. Meet
me at Perdition the morning after, and trust me. There’s going to
be hell to pay, boys.”
Duke scowled at Ryker, who
smirked at him. Ken Doll whispered something to Elizabeth that Duke
couldn’t hear, but he’d bet his boots it was an apology. She
crossed her arms over her chest and glared at him, but eventually,
her eyes softened. He gingerly kissed her forehead and she dabbed at
his bruised and bloody face with a napkin, then she placed her arm
around him and escorted Ryker from the restaurant.
Fucking Ryker. He has it
too easy.
Duke hesitated at the edge of
the room, long enough to draw some unwanted attention. Chesty got to
her feet, but he shook his head. He sure as shit didn’t want to
talk to her. She had a tight pussy, but not much going on above the
shoulders.
He felt like pounding his
fists into the walls, but it would only earn him a beat down from
Captain. So, he wandered out to the parking lot behind the diner to
walk off some of this toxic shit.
At this rate, he’d have to
hoof it to China.
After fifteen minutes of
pacing back and forth, he stilled when he heard the scrape of the
metal door behind him.
“What the hell crawled up
your ass tonight?” the VP asked, apparently cutting right to the
chase.
Duke turned away, folding his
arms over his chest. “Don’t know what the fuck you’re talkin’
about. I’m fine.”
Shepherd didn’t comment,
pulled out a smoke and sparked it up in that unnerving, almost
supernatural, far-too-patient way of his. He tucked a stray strand of
blond hair behind his ear and simply waited for Duke to start
talking, like the biker version of Buddha.
“It’s nothing,” Duke
insisted.
The VP lifted one brow,
clearly not buying his bullshit.
Duke clenched his hands. “I’m
not some goddamn cocksucker, for the motherfuckin’ record.” The
words exploded from his throat, before he could jam them back down.
Fuck. So much for my
private life.
Shepherd leaned against the
brick wall, barely beyond the floodlights overhead, and it wreathed
his face in shadows. After a long moment, he spoke quietly, “I know
you aren’t, brother. He obviously struck a nerve.”
Even though Duke had spent
five fucking years in prison, he hadn’t resorted to dick. He’d
slapped the snot out of the first lady-boy who’d hit on him and
he’d picked a fight with the biggest mother fucker on his cell
block, so he didn’t risk being anybody’s bitch either. Then, it
was a matter of not being caught alone. Safety in numbers.
“Damn straight. I fucking
love pussy. If Ryker thinks—”
Shep made a disgusted noise in
his throat, cutting off the tirade. “Since when do you give a
flying fuck what Ryker thinks? He got a rise out of you because he’s
pissed about Captain. The Prez is making a move on Eddie and he can’t
do a damn thing about it. He used you to let off some steam and you
made a very convenient punching bag.”
He rubbed the back of his
neck and sighed. Shep was right, of course. It was one of his most
irritating qualities. He had a way of bypassing all of someone’s
shit and going straight to the fucking bullseye. “I really do hate
that fucker.”
“You don’t say?” Shep
deadpanned.
“Kiss my ass.”
“No offense, but you ain’t
my type, brother.” He blew a couple of smoke rings.
“You’re so fucking funny.”
“You’ve got no idea,
Duke,” the VP drawled, an edge in his voice. “But come on, I
ain’t gettin’ any younger here. What set you off tonight? You and
Ryker usually bug the fuck out of each other, but you seem pricklier
than usual, emphasis on the prick.”
“Nothin’ to tell,
brother,” Duke said firmly, ending the conversation. Ryker had
unwittingly blundered into dangerous territory and it had gotten the
best of Duke. Not about his most recent stint in prison, but his
childhood.
But he didn’t share that
shit with anyone. Not his mother, not Eddie, certainly not the prison
psychiatrist, and not his brothers either. He kept that shit six
fucking feet under. Dead and buried where it belonged.
Shepherd puffed a sigh. “Fine.
Have it your way. You always do. All I need to know is you got your
shit together now?”
“Yeah,” he muttered.
The VP finally stepped back
into the light and Duke thought, for a moment, how weary his brother
appeared. How worn.
“What about you?” he
asked, noting the deep, dark circles beneath his eyes. He obviously
hadn’t had a good night’s rest in weeks. “You look like you’ve
been on a long bender in Vegas.”
“Thanks, brother.” He
laughed, without much humor.
“Anything I can do to help?”
“No, no one can help me.
Not with this.”
Duke studied Shep carefully.
Something was wrong.
Really fucking wrong.
Maybe the role of VP weighed
on him? He basically took on all of their problems, settling beefs
between the brothers, scrutinizing new members and old ladies. It had
to be a fuckin’ thankless job. Bikers weren’t exactly known for
their good choices.
“Night, brother,” Shep
said and then he ambled back inside.
Duke stared at the closed door
for a moment and made a mental note to check on him later, maybe
offer to take on some extra responsibilities. He bitched about Shep
all the time, but he respected him.
Ah hell, he fucking loved the
bastard. He was the closest thing Duke had to an actual sibling, not
that he’d ever admit it. As he headed for the door, a bottle
clattered to the ground on the far side of the parking lot, grabbing
his attention.
When he investigated, he found
Rose seated on a set of concrete stairs near the loading dock. She
had a cigarette in her mouth and tried in vain to get a pink
disposable lighter to work. Near her feet, an empty beer bottle
rolled back and forth on the uneven pavement.
When she saw him, she
swallowed, eyes skittering away. Duke knew from experience she wanted
to avoid his ass. He had witnessed one of her most vulnerable
moments. She’d been helpless, dressed as a fuck toy. To deal with
scary shit, you had to shove it down and not think on it. Hard to do
when the man who’d witnessed your degradation stood in front of
you.
But, he couldn’t walk away.
Not yet.
Duke sat down and plucked the
cigarette from her mouth. She gasped in protest as he placed it in
his own, but made no move to snatch it away from him. With a grin, he
produced his Horsemen Zippo, etched with the club logo, and lit the
cigarette with a flourish, then handed it back to her. She offered
him the tiniest of smiles, before placing the cigarette between her
lips, exactly where his mouth had been moments ago.
And as fucking crazy as it
sounded, it pleased him.
“Thanks.” She inhaled
deeply and then coughed a bit. Clearly, she wasn’t a smoker. He
grabbed a cigar from the inner pocket of his cut, as well as his
stainless steel cutter. He preferred Ashton Symmetry cigars, which
featured a crown emblem, like the tattoo on his back. They had a
spicy scent and an earthy taste he found comforting.
During his stint in the
military as a Special Forces sniper, he’d gotten into the habit of
smoking. It settled his nerves after he’d taken out a target. He
clipped the end of the cigar and toasted the tip of it in the Zippo
flame until it began to smolder. Now, all he needed was a scotch and
soda.
She staggered to her feet,
grabbed her bag, and the empty bottle.
He seized her leg and she
flinched. Immediately, he released her and she rubbed the spot as
though she’d been burned. “Sit down.”
Her eyes flashed, a bit of
spirit showing. It cheered him. He didn’t want to think of her as
broken, maybe because he’d been the one to free her. Though he
could tell she’d sustained quite a bit of damage. Any fool could
see it.
“Why?”
He didn’t say a word, merely
waited to be obeyed.
Rose stood there, staring at
him and he could see the emotions drift across her pretty face—
annoyance, resentment, and then finally resignation.
She plunked back down, though
she put a couple feet between their bodies and heaved a disgusted
sigh. “What do you want?”
“I want to ask you a couple
of questions.” Shep didn’t have the market cornered on being a
nosy bastard. He normally hated to get involved, but someone had to.
She smiled. It was the fake
one she used on Cowboy and Daisy all the time. “I’m fine.”
“I didn’t ask, but we both
know you’re lying.”
Her big brown eyes got
impossibly wider.
“I know you aren’t fine.
What’s going on?” he said.
“Nothing.”
“I ain’t lettin’ it go,
so you might as well save us both the time and level with me.”
Rose stared straight ahead, as
though mesmerized by the asphalt. “It’s nothing, really. I’m
coping, that’s all.” She gestured with the cigarette and bottle.
“How did you get the beer?”
“I, uh—”
“Stole it?” he offered.
“Borrowed
it.”
“Borrowing means you were
going to give it back at some point.” He sighed. “You’re what?
Twenty?”
“Nineteen,” she answered.
Fuck. That’s young.
Duke would be thirty-nine next January, which made him a fucking old
man compared to her. Talk about a knee to the balls.
Wait. Why the fuck do I
care how old the girl is?
“You know, the club could
help you.”
“With drinking?” she said,
brow furrowing.
“No, with documentation.
Ryker is in charge of ordering booze for Perdition and Hades. He
accounts for every fucking beer. Trust me. Sooner or later, he will
figure it out.” He made a face. “If you had a fake ID, you get
your own hooch without anyone bein’ the wiser. I could get one made
for you.”
Her eyes rounded. “Um, okay.
Thanks.”
Duke watched as the metal door
leading inside, swung open and Chesty came trotting out, evidently
impatient to be fucked. She lit a smoke, staring at him from across
the lot. Thank God she didn’t approach them.
“I’ll get the ID to you
tomorrow,” he said to Rose. “But you have to promise me one
thing.”
“What’s that?”
“Drink somethin’ with a
bit more kick than beer. Like Jack or Jim. Self-medicating only works
if you put your back into it.”
She cocked her head. “You
mean you aren’t going to tell my sister?”
“Why would I? Ain’t her
business.”
She nodded, standing once more
and he jumped to his feet. Before she could walk away, he clutched
her sleeve, yanking it up her arm before she could stop him. He
needed to check something.
“Hey!” she cried, swatting
at him with her other hand.
Ignoring her, he examined her
skin. As he’d suspected, she had a series of red lines
crisscrossing her pale forearm. She’d been cutting herself.
Most people assumed cutting
was a suicidal gesture, but Duke knew better. Cutting had more to do
with survival than anything else. Sometimes, focusing on a spot of
physical pain instead of the awful emotional kind could be a relief.
It was the world’s worst way to cope with excruciating shit. He
noted she’d avoided the veins in her arms and the cuts were
shallow, so she hadn’t done any serious harm.
“Let me go!” she howled.
He ignored her and instead
carefully traced one of the lines. The skin had turned an
angry-looking red, and felt hot to the touch. “These are getting
infected. If you’re going to keep cutting, you need to take better
care of yourself.”
“I—”
“No,” he muttered, “You
don’t need to tell me a comforting lie. I don’t expect you to be
okay, or normal, or whatever the fuck they want you to be. I know
you’re a mess and you should
be a mess after what you’ve been through.”
“How
did you know?”
she whispered, glancing at her arm. “That I’ve been cutting?”
Across the lot, the hellion
cleared her throat, and it echoed off the wall, loudly. Fuck.
He hated needy chicks. Duke didn’t bother making eye contact.
“I saw you tugging at your
sleeves earlier and made an educated guess,” Duke said sadly. He
wished he’d been wrong. He read the question in her eyes. “No,
I’m not going to tell your sister, but you have to keep the wounds
clean, so you don’t lose your fucking arm. What are you using to
slice yourself?”
Rose bit her lower lip. “A
paring knife I snagged from the kitchens.”
He reluctantly released her
arm. “You need a very sharp blade, one you sanitize between cuts.
He withdrew his pocket knife and tossed it to her. “Be careful with
the fucking thing, it’s sharp as shit. Don’t accidentally cut
your arm off.”
“Why are you helping me?”
she asked with wide, wary eyes as she tucked the knife into the
pocket of her jeans.
Fuck if I know.
“Because I can.”
“Thank you,” she
whispered.
Duke sighed. “Don’t thank
me. I’m only doing damage control. And I want you to think about
something.”
“What?”
“You’re free. You got away
from him, physically at least. But not mentally. Not yet, anyway.”
Tears welled in her eyes.
“Don’t let him keep you in
that cage too much longer or you’ll lose yourself, Rose. Oblivion
is a comfort, but it’s an illusion, it ain’t the way out.”
He went to Chesty, who beamed
at him, eager for his attention. Duke put his arm around her and led
her to a hotel room, he planned on commandeering for a night of
oblivion.
Yeah, he’d just given Rose
some damn good advice.
Too bad he’d never taken it
himself.
Will be found here come release day:
Cynthia
Rayne is the author of the Amazon best-selling Four Horsemen MC series.
Her first erotic book was written when she was thirteen. Of course, the
most risqué scene involved kissing, but it was the talk of her middle
school!
She is currently pursuing a doctoral degree in education
and writes whenever she can. In her spare time, she enjoys dating,
shopping, reading way too many romance novels, and drinking a truly
obscene amount of coffee. Find out more about Cynthia Rayne and the Four
Horsemen, and signup for the new release newsletter on the website: http://www.cynthiarayne.com/
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