It's
1976, and Anita Bryant's homophobic "Save Our Children"
crusade rages through Florida. When Andy Hunsinger, a closeted gay
college student, joins in a demonstration protesting Bryant's
appearance in Tallahassee, his straight boy image is shattered when
he's "outed" by a TV news reporter.
In
the months following, Andy discovers just what it means to be openly
gay in a society that condemns love between two men.
Can
Andy's friendship with Travis, a devout Christian who's fighting his
own sexual urges, develop into something deeper?
On
my seventh birthday, my parents gave me a Dr. Seuss book, The Cat in
the Hat.
I
still have it; the book rests on the shelf above my desk, along with
other Seuss works I've collected. Inside The Cat in the Hat's cover,
my mother wrote an inscription, using her English teacher's precise
penmanship.
"Happy
Birthday, Andy. As you grow older, you'll realize many truths dwell
within these pages. Much love, Mom and Dad."
Mom
was right, of course. She most always is.
My
favorite line in The Cat in the Hat is this one:
"Be
who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter
and those who matter don't mind."
***
Loretta
McPhail was a notorious Tallahassee slumlord. On a steamy afternoon,
in August 1976, she spoke to me in her North Florida drawl: part
magnolia, part crosscut saw.
"The
rent's one-twenty-five. I'll need first, last, and a security
deposit, no exceptions."
McPhail
wore a short-sleeved shirtwaist dress, spectator pumps, and a straw
hat with a green plastic windowpane sewn into the brim. Her skin was
as pale as cake flour. A gray moustache grew on her winkled upper
lip, and age spots peppered the backs of her hands. Her eyeglasses
had lenses so thick her gaze looked buggy.
I'd
heard McPhail held title to more than fifty properties in town, all
of them cited multiple times for violation of local building codes.
She owned rooming houses, single family homes, and small apartment
buildings, mostly in neighborhoods surrounding Florida State
University's campus. Like me, her tenants sought cheap rent; they
didn't care if the roof leaked or the furnace didn't work.
The
Franklin Street apartment I viewed with McPhail wasn't much: a living
room and kitchen, divided by a three-quarter wall; a bedroom with
windows looking into the rear and side yards; a bathroom with a
wall-mounted sink, a shower stall and a toilet with a broken seat. In
each room, the plaster ceilings bore water marks. The carpet was a
leopard skin of suspicious-looking stains, and the whole place stank
of mildew and cat pee.
McPhail's
building was a two-storied, red brick four-plex with casement windows
that opened like book covers, a Panhandle style of architecture
popular in the 1950s. Shingles on the pitched roof curled at their
edges. Live oaks and longleaf pines shaded the crabgrass lawn, and
skeletal azaleas clung to the building's exterior.
In
the kitchen, I peeked inside a rust-pitted Frigidaire. The previous
tenant had left gifts: a half-empty ketchup bottle, another of pickle
relish. A carton of orange juice with an expiration date three months
past sat beside a tub of margarine.
Out
in the stairwell, piano music tinkled -- a jazzy number I didn't
recognize.
McPhail
clucked her tongue and shook her head.
"I've
told Fergal -- and I mean several times -- to close his door when he
plays, but he never does. I'm not sure why I put up with that boy."
McPhail
pulled a pack of Marlboros from a pocket in the skirt of her dress.
After tapping out two cigarettes, she jammed both between her lips.
She lit the Marlboros with a brushed-chrome Zippo, and then she gave
me one cigarette.
I
puffed and tapped a toe, letting my gaze travel about the kitchen. I
studied the chipped porcelain sink, scratched Formica countertops,
and drippy faucet. Blackened food caked the range's burner pans. The
linoleum floor's confetti motif had long ago disappeared in
high-traffic areas. Okay, the place was a dump. But the rent was
cheap, and campus was less than a mile away. I could ride my bike to
classes, and to my part-time job as caddy at the Capital City Country
Club.
Still,
I hesitated.
The
past two years, I'd lived in my fraternity house with forty brothers.
I took my meals there, too. If I rented McPhail's apartment, I'd have
to cook for myself. What would I eat? Where would I shop for food?
Other
questions flooded my brain. Where would I wash my clothes? And how
did a guy open a utilities account? The apartment wasn't furnished.
Where would I purchase a bed? What about a dinette and living room
furniture? And how much did such things cost? It all seemed so
complicated.
Still
. . .
Lack
of privacy at the fraternity house would pose a problem for me this
year. Over summer break -- back home in Pensacola -- I'd experienced
my first sexual encounter with another male, a lanky serviceman named
Jeff Dellinger, age twenty-four. Jeff was a Second Lieutenant from
Eglin Air Force Base. I met him at a sand volleyball game behind a
Pensacola Beach hotel, and he seemed friendly. I liked his dark hair,
slim physique, and ready smile, but wasn't expecting anything
personal to happen between us.
After
all, I was a "straight boy", right?
We
bought each other beers at the Tiki bar, and then Jeff invited me up
to his hotel room. Once we reached the room, Jeff prepared two
vodka/tonics. My drink struck like snake venom, and then my brain
fuzzed. Jeff opened a bureau drawer; he produced a lethal-looking
pistol fashioned from black metal. The pistol had a matte finish and
a checked grip.
"Ever
seen one of these?"
I
shook my head.
"It's
an M1911 -- official Air Force issue. I've fired it dozens of times."
Jeff
raised the gun to shoulder height. He closed one eye, focused his
other on the pistol's barrel sight. "Shooting's almost...
sensual," he said. Then he looked at me. "It's like sex, if
you know what I mean."
I
shrugged, not knowing what to say.
Jeff
handed the pistol to me. It weighed more than I'd expected, between
two and three pounds. I turned the pistol here and there, admiring
its sleek contours. The grip felt cold against my palm and a shiver
ran through me. I'd never fired a handgun, never thought to.
"Is
it loaded?" I asked.
Jeff
bobbed his chin. "One bullet's in the firing chamber, seven more
in the magazine; it's a semi-automatic."
After
I handed Jeff the gun, he returned it to his bureau's drawer while I
sipped from my drink, feeling woozier by the minute. Jeff sat next to
me, on the room's double bed. His knee nudged mine, our shoulders
touched, and I smelled his coconut-scented sunscreen.
Jeff
laid a hand on my thigh. Then he squeezed. "You don't mind, do
you?"
Often
times in life courage is one of the most important aspects that many
of us can be armed with. Living in the closet about any issue can
tear at the heartstrings of a person and cause all sorts of internal
illnesses. This book is about the coming of age of a young gay man as
well as romantic aspects too.
The
author Jere' M. Fishback really knows how to weave a story to
perfection. Fishback keeps the interest of his readers by having the most
down to earth main character ever! By the time you finish this book
you feel as if you grew up with the guy! The issues presented by the
author are definitely real and I am sure felt by those living in the
closet or wanting to come out in the open even today. I believe this
book can also be an encouraging factor for those that are sitting on
the fence as well as those that are living in seclusion too. More
books like this need to be available! I believe reading another's
story even if fictional can and will be comforting to those in the
same situations in real life.
I really enjoyed this book I give Fishback a rating of 5 stars and recommend to all those that are interested in understanding the life of a young gay male that comes out of the closet in the late seventies.
Jere'
M. Fishback is a former news editor and trial lawyer. He writes Young
Adult novels, short fiction, and memoirs. A Florida native, he lives
on a barrier island on the Gulf of Mexico, west of Tampa/St.
Petersburg. When he's not writing, Jere' enjoys cycling, surfing,
lap-swimming, and watching sunsets with a glass of wine in hand.
Ogitchida Kwe's Book Blog
March 19 Interview
Author Karen Swart
March 20 Character Interview
Eclipse Reviews
March 23 Review
BFD Book Blog
March 24 Spotlight
Books Direct
March 25 Interview
Deal Sharing Aunt
March 26 Spotlight
Lisa’s World of Books
March 27 Guest blog
The Creatively Green Write at Home Mom
March 30 Spotlight
CBY Book Club
March 31 Guest blog
ARe Cafe
I really enjoyed this book and hope to read more of your works in the near future!
ReplyDelete